Immersion Fun in China!

Immersion in china can be extremely frustrating.  I’ve been trying to determine if I was in a country full of the most jerks per person.  (I used another word, but I’ve calmed down a little since then..most who are studying use the other  word.  You get a lot of people asking for help in English, and I’m happy to do so, for the most part.  When I ask for help in Chinese though, I get a completely different reaction.  If I say something wrong, they laugh at me, repeat the error, then walk away laughing.  If I laugh at their English, they get offended and run away.  The double standard irritates me to no end.  I was finally talking to someone and asked why a country of people who want help with their English could be so rude when asked for help in Chinese in return, in other words, (and most likely exactly what I said), why is China so full of @**-h0l*s???  It’s not like this is an easy language, and I find that this method of “help” just makes things worse.  It’s hard to talk to people when you know that what they’re going to do is laugh when you make a mistake, then repeat it and walk away.  It’s no wonder that so many people give up on the language here and leave hating China a great deal.

The problem actually stems from what they’re taught about Canada and the USA while they study English for 8 to 12 years (and their English still sucks).  They’re taught that Americans and Canadians are very open and welcoming people, and that the Chinese are very closed off people.  Therefore, Canadians and Americans don’t take anything personally, while Chinese lose face and get insulted when laughed at.  Therefore, when an American or a Canadian makes a mistake, it’s okay to laugh at them.  I think you find this attitude to a certain extent, even at home, and is why Chinese people tend to be the worst salesmen and marketers in Canada, because they simply don’t understand their target audience.  It’s also, I believe, just one more reason why they’re not doing far better in business than they could be.

I still find it hard to believe though, that they can walk around with these blinders on and never actually see anything from anyone else’s point of view, they can’t “put themselves into someone else’s shoes” at any given time.  I guess that this is just an extension of wandering through life with your eyes glued to your smartphone, wandering through traffic and crowds, and being simply amazed when you run into other people or stationary objects.  (I still don’t know why the death toll isn’t way up due to people wandering through traffic playing games on their smartphones.

I think that the only way to actually get the practice in is to do a language trade with someone.  I think it’s important to state outright that if they laugh at you, you’ll be happy to do the same to them.  If they want help, they have to give it in return.  In fact, I am going to start taking the lead, getting help first, and then base my degree of help on how helpful they are to me.  Perhaps that seems a bit selfish, but honestly, they need me more than I need them, there are a couple of other billion people here who speak their language, I should be able to find at least one person willing to help.

I’m also extremely amazed at how much different they are from Koreans.  Koreans were always happy and honoured that you would come to their country and attempt to learn their language.  I could approach anyone in the street and ask for help with a concept or a word, and someone would generally drop what they’re doing to help.  Here, they seem to do their best to make sure I want to go find somewhere else to live.  That’s just one of many differences between Koreans and Chinese.  It amazes me that they get along so well, since they seem to be so different, culturally.

I decided to get cupping done at a massage studio on Monday.  We went to the top Chinese medicine specialists in Shenzhen.  Cupping is an amazing experience, and definitely something that I will do, and probably regret doing again.  You lay flat on your stomach.  If you’re smarter than I am then you’ll lay completely flat, breathe shallowly and keep yourself as still as possible. 

A crazy man comes in with a couple of baskets full of jars.  You can’t see what’s happening, and that’s probably a good thing.  He sprays a tiger balm spray on your back, which starts to tingle and burn a bit, then he lights a torch, grabs the first cup which has some sort of flammable liquid in it, and lights it, he snaps it onto your back where the lack of oxygen suctions it to your skin.  He places about 15-20 cups on your skin, and you hang out for 20 minutes.  If you’re not flat and motionless, the cups will come off and fall and break, which is irritating.  Also, he tries to put them back on your back, which is a little disturbing.

After 20 minutes, he comes back, and pulls the cups off, then he sprays tiger balm, thickly onto your back, rubs it in, then wraps your back in a reflective type of poly.  The heat from the tiger balm, combined with the suctioned up blood from the cups makes your back more than a little sensitive.  After that burning sensation, he grabs a bag full of rice that has been sitting in an oven for a couple of hours, it’s a bit warm, and he rolls that over your back a few hundred times (it was probably less, but I was so sensitive at this point that It seemed like a lot more).  You can then relax, wait for things to calm down, and sip some tea before getting dressed and heading out.

I have never slept so well in my memory as that first night of sleep after cupping.  Right now, it’s 3 days later, and it feels like someone is punching me in my back, it’s less than pleasant.  I’m told that in 2 days, I will be in love with life, and that you feel any better.  We’ll see.